4 Deeper Dangers of Social Media Every Parent Should Know

The world has finally caught on: giving preteen boys and girls unfettered access to social media is just a really bad idea. The research conclusively proves that ongoing interaction with social media damages young people on multiple levels.

Now governments around the world have begun to step in with mandated controls – in some cases raising the age limits for social media use up to 16. In the United States, just last month, 51 states and territories reached a landmark settled to the tune of over $17 billion with Meta, the parent company of Facebook and Instagram. The state attorneys general pressed charges against Meta for intentionally designing their platforms to draw teens and children into a pattern of addictive behavior. Even though the company refused to admit wrong-doing, the settlement speaks for itself. The agreement also includes some minor platform reforms – supposedly to decrease the addictive tendencies.

But all this brings up a telling question: how did we arrive at a place where state and federal governments must intervene to protect teens and children from this danger? They are filling a void. It begs the question: where have the parents been throughout this growing crisis?

Assuming that parents of teens genuinely want the best for their young people, we have to conclude that they must be unaware of the dangers of this technology. Those dangers reach far beyond ADD or a shortened attention. Here are four dangers that are worth considering.

Danger 1: An invitation to compare

No doubt we can all relate to the sense of discontentment and gloom that descends as we scroll through all the incredible experiences that everyone else in the world seems to enjoy continually, while we are stuck in the mundane dredge of everyday life. The steady stream of vacations, social events, nature shots, and carefully curated snapshots invite us to evaluate our lives by what seems to be normal. Given their strong desire for peer acceptance, teens are especially prone to the discontent that this constant comparison invites. As Paul reminds us in 2 Corinthians 10:12, this really is not wise.

Danger 2: An inclination toward superficiality

Social media platforms invite teens to craft a public persona. While this curated image may not be intentionally false or misleading, it necessarily highlights only certain aspects of their lives. In the world of social networking, people only know what the user wants them to know. Hiding behind this photoshopped identity creates a feeling of security but unintentionally creates a barrier to relational closeness. Rather than helping a teen embrace face to face interactions, it makes it harder. Many teens state that they feel uncomfortable interacting without the filter of a screen. This lack of relational transparency can even affect their view of how to properly relate to God.

Danger 3: An illusion of closeness

When television was a relatively new technology, it revolutionized the entertainment industry –because it gave opportunity for the audience to experience a close-up. It created an illusion of closeness. Now, every person has the opportunity to create that same illusion of closeness through the medium of social media. But screen connections engender artificiality – not authenticity. Online communication tends to flow in one direction, putting up a further barrier to authenticity. A one-way conversation is hardly a dialogue. And so, we are left wanting more. Seeking for deeper relational connection, teens sometimes

turn to unhealthy ways of expression. The rise of social media use among teens coincides with a dramatic increase in teen use of pornography over the last decade.[1] Far from bringing relational closeness, pornography trains teens to objectify people made in God’s image. This path of self-love leads to further emptiness. All too often, social media serves as a gateway to this disturbing trend.

Danger 4: An imprudent standard of affirmation

Recent studies have connected compulsive social media use to the rise of suicidal ideation among teens.[2]  What’s the connection? Some young people turn to social media to forget or avoid their real-life problems. Others turn to social media for the affirmation that they crave. When they encounter lack of response, criticism, or bullying instead, they can easily spiral into despair. By looking to strangers or casual acquaintances for approval instead of those who genuinely know them, teens open themselves up to a dangerous vulnerability. And, after the initial rush wears off, even a outpouring of likes leaves a void.

Relational by design

God created people to be relational. This characteristic is a foundational aspect of being made in his image. A core desire to relate deeply to other people finds its source in the very essence of God. Triune by nature, God is inherently relational. All people need relationships in order to fulfill their God-designed purpose (Genesis 2:18). This created purpose explains why human beings are driven to form relationships – whether healthy or unhealthy.

Sadly, many teens substitute shallow relationships for ones that could be deeply meaningful. Social media encourages this artificiality. Whether Snapchat, Instagram, YouTube, Tik-Tok, or some other, yet to be invented, social media platform, the dangers are real. Banishing young people from social media is not the answer; teaching them a better way is. Because deep down, God designed them to yearn for something better.

For a deeper exploration of this subject, see a full-length white paper written by the author for The Wilds Christian Association which is available for download here: Created to Connect: Helping Teens Develop Deeper Relationships.

[1] 1 “Teens and Pornography.” Common Sense Media, https://www.commonsensemedia.org/research/teens-and-pornography. According to the study, the average age for first viewing pornography is 12.

[2] 2 Xiao Y, Meng Y, Brown TT, Keyes KM, Mann JJ. Addictive Screen Use Trajectories and Suicidal Behaviors, Suicidal Ideation, and Mental Health in US Youths. JAMA. 2025;334(3):219–228. doi:10.1001/jama.2025.7829. JAMA article