You’ve felt those eyes before, burning across the room at you. Your child, arms crossed, has pitted his will against yours, and you feel like you are losing. What began as an attempt to obey God and spiritually lead your children has turned into a showdown. His rotten attitude has riled your sin nature, destroying whatever hope you had of a harmonious time of Bible reading and prayer together as a family. With a family of sinners led by imperfect parents, how can you avoid this scenario as you introduce family devotions into your family’s culture?

1. Start Well.

Begin a pattern of family devotions when your children are small (2 Timothy 3:15). Incorporate reading God’s Word and praying together into the fabric of your family life and the daily schedule. Your children will come to expect that this is what a Christian family does.

If your children are older, then prepare them ahead of time for the shift in habits. Introduce family devotions to your family’s schedule at a transition point like the beginning of the school year or the week when school resumes after the New Year’s holiday. Explain to your older children why God wants your family to read His Word and pray together regularly. You are obeying God by leading them spiritually. Help them see how this discipline helps them grow and glorify God (Proverbs 2:1–5). Get everyone on the same page. No last-minute surprises!

2. Guard Consistency.

Set a daily time for family devotions and stick to it. Let your children know when they are expected to be at family devotions and approximately how long it will take. If you miss a day, just do it the next day. Don’t be rigid. Go for the cumulative, long-term effect. Be dedicated on school days and flexible on weekends and holidays. Use the normal routine of school and work to your advantage.

3. Keep It Short.

Fifteen to thirty minutes should be sufficient and repeatable daily. Lengthy diatribes tend to incite resentment among children who have much to do in the day ahead. Be sensitive to your children’s schedule and the pressures they are facing.

4. Leave Conviction to the Holy Spirit.

When you read a passage that seems so opportune for addressing your child’s failings, avoid the trap of hammering the point home in front of the whole family. Let the Holy Spirit work through the Word as your children are regularly exposed to the truth in your family devotions. Encouragement rather than condemnation should characterize this time.

5. Have a Plan.

Children thrive on predictability. Routine is your friend. Find a pattern for prayer and Bible reading that works for your family. Sing well-known hymns together. Memorize simple scripture passages if you can. Add variety with different Bible passages and songs but keep the overall structure the same. Your children will know what to expect and develop a warm familiarity with this time together before God.

A Ready Launchpad

No, these tips do not guarantee family unity during devotions together. You are a sinner raising sinners. The innate self-centeredness in each family member will spark conflict at times. However, these simple practices will provide a healthy environment for biblical and spiritual growth. Pray for God to use you and these times as opportunities to water the seed of the Word in the hearts of your children (2 Peter 3:18). Pursue individual conversations after family devotions when you sense God working or encouragement is needed. Your family devotional time can become a launchpad for truly understanding and spiritually leading your children.[1]

[1] Not sure how to practically lead family devotions? Subscribe to my author website and download a one-page summary to help you get started. The next article also provides a sample plan or rundown of a typical family devotions time in our family. In addition, you can read the previous posts (#1 or #2) in this series on family devotions.

Some parents, particularly of older children, have used my missions devotional, Daring Devotion, as a supplement during their family devotions. A sequel missions devotional will be released in late November 2022.

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