Does it seem to you that ministry sometimes devolves into a frantic cycle of putting out fires? Where do these fires come from? If you take inventory, you may just find that you have had a hand in igniting or fueling them.
Are You the Arsonist? Choose Not to Light Fires.
A spark can be a good thing. We need fellow believers to motivate us—to get us up and serving the Lord as we should. However, too often the fires we kindle are due to interpersonal friction. We rub people the wrong way. Maybe it’s not what we do (though it could be). Maybe it’s how we do it. If pride, envy, or self-seeking taint our motives, we can start a chain reaction among those around us, especially with those who struggle in the same areas. “Only by pride comes contention” (Proverbs 13:10). But God calls us to meekness.[1] His wisdom prioritizes peacemaking.
The words of James quench incendiary thought patterns: “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace” (James 3:13–18).
Don’t be an unintentional arsonist. Be humble. Be a peacemaker.
Are You at the Bellows? Refrain from Stoking Fires.
So, you didn’t start the conflict, but now that it’s going, the fight is on. Your spirit flares within you: “People can’t treat me like that. I have to stand up for myself. I can’t let others run me over!”
When you calm down, you realize this response is wrong. But what if other believers keep stirring up trouble when you are trying to deescalate matters? God requires that His people seek peace, regardless of what others do: “If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men” (Romans 12:18). If a conflict continues to smolder, make sure that you are not keeping that divisive ember alive. You cannot (and should not try to) control what others do, but you must, as best you can, work toward biblical restoration.
Step away from the bellows. Turn the other cheek. Don’t fight back.
Are You Leaving a Trail of Ash? Burn No Bridges Behind You.
Sometimes, you must move on. This may loosen your tongue. You may feel the freedom to speak your mind. The snide comment slips out. The pent-up frustration boils over in a cutting remark. A rash email shoots from your outbox. Refrain from firing the parting shot.
The apostle Paul warns of corrupt communication and then follows that admonition with the command not to grieve the Holy Spirit that is within us (Ephesians 4:29–30). We grieve the Holy Spirit when our words tear down others. However, when we walk in the Spirit relying on His guidance and strength, the result is peace—within and without: “The fruit of the Spirit is . . . peace” (Galatians 5:22). Those walking in the Spirit bring peace rather than give in to the urge to have the last word.
Furthermore, nothing ever stays burnt. I can remember my shock one day when I bumped into a former coworker from fifteen years earlier on the completely other side of the world. What you think you left behind you often reappears later in your life. People you thought were in your past can reemerge in your present. They might even end up as your boss.
When it’s time to go, burn no bridges behind you.
Be a Fireman
Christians are firemen, called to be peacemakers. When we bring people together through Jesus Christ, we imitate our heavenly Father, the God of all peace (Romans 15:33). “Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God” (Matthew 5:9). Others recognize us as children of God when we act like our heavenly Father and bring peace in conflict.
God has given us the ministry of reconciliation, not the spirit of strife (2 Corinthians 5:18–19). God made us right with Him through Jesus Christ (Romans 5:1). We extend that offer to the unsaved and live that reality in the church. To fight with one another in the church or in ministry is the antithesis of what we are called to do.
Yes, the wisdom from above is first pure and then peaceable (James 3:17). We must not compromise the truth to buy false peace. However, the fires we fan in the church are most often of the flesh and not out of fervency for the truth. God has called us to peace.
Fires belong in hell, not in the church. Be a fireman. Put the fires out.
[1] For an excellent example of this kind of meekness that leads to peace in a ministry team, read the testimony of missionary to China D. E. Hoste in Day 18 of my missions devotional, Daring Dependence.
Also, check out Paul Seger’s recent book, Disloyal: When Loyal People Aren’t. His observations from experience and Scripture give insights into other interpersonal matters that lead to friction and conflict in the church and ministry.
Photo credit: Daniel Tausis on unsplash
